As I believe I mentioned on one of the last Straight-to-DVD Corner posts, the straight-to-video sequels of theatrical releases (such as The Butterfly Effect 2, Urban Legends: Bloody Mary, and I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer) are never as much fun as the franchises from which they were born (and I realize that the originals of the sequels I just listed were not particularly fantastic, but all were fun for what they were. So leave me alone about it. Seriously. Get off my back.) But I’ll be a monkey’s uncle if I didn’t find an exception to my little rule (not that I’m saying anything bad about monkeys, I would consider myself lucky to be the uncle of any sort of primate, except maybe the baboon because those guys seem particularly dangerous.)
Posts Tagged ‘pigs’
Straight-to-DVD Corner with Todd: Zombie Sequel Exception
September 19th, 2008 by ToddStraight-to-DVD Corner with Todd: Too Good For DVD
September 12th, 2008 by ToddWhen it comes to shit that gets dumped on video, most of the time you can see why. If it’s action, you’ve got your Seagal movies, Snipes movies, Van Damme movies, and those odd Jason Statham movies that come out in between his theatrical releases. All are junk. (The Seagal movies are a great source of guilty pleasure because each one is a greater trainwreck than the last one…trainwrecks beyond imagination.) And then you’ve got your thrillers with Morgan Freeman or Christian Slater or even Gene Hackman these days. It’s always clear why they are not in the theater, usually because their plot lines are indecipherable and the movies are just plain boring (even more so than the boring shit they actually do release in the theater) or, you know, it’s because they star Christian Slater. As far as I can tell, the only genre that provides little gems in the straight-to-video market is the horror genre. It’s tricky to navigate, of course, because there are also more unwatchable DIY movies in the horror genre than any other.
An Open Love Letter To Pete and Laxdude
July 8th, 2008 by ToddDearest Pete and Laxdude,
Forgive the time it’s taken me to write this heartfelt love letter that Stephen Falk promised I would write to anyone who watched all of Bratz (right after he threw a tantrum that would have embarrassed my actual two-year-old.) I have been quite busy not making any money.
It’s Pigs fans like you that make it all worthwhile. Pete, your dedication to listening to our drunken ramblings during mostly horrid picture shows warms my cockles. (Not a dirty word. Look it up. Freak.) And Laxdude, your love of pie and the guy who played the station manager in the indie feature Buttleman along with your dislike of Lunchables makes us kindred spirits (although I find all three forms of Battlestar Galactica’s incredibly long stretches without space battles eternally frustrating, I have no idea what the difference is between union and league rugby, and I find it disconcerting that you paid money to see Hot Rod. But, still. Kindred spirits.) (more…)
