DVD COMMENTARY: 10,000 BC (2008)

dvdcover100w_10000bcAt the dawn of human civilization, there was this guy who hunted giant cartoon mastodons, was chased by prehistoric man-eating ostriches, and totally fucked up this pyramid. He did this because some other guys kidnapped his girlfriend…and the guy who owned the pyramid made everybody think he was a god or something…a disembodied Omar Sharif kept talking every now and then…

Okay, this movie is stupid, even for a premise that abandons at the first frame any thought of possibly trying to be somewhat in the neighborhood of historically accurate. Even worse, it is boring. Mind-numbingly boring. Somehow, a movie that has computer generated mastodons, saber-toothed tigers, and killer ostriches is so dull it makes you pine for an auto accident-induced coma. Who would have figured that the creative genius behind Independence Day and Eight Legged Freaks was Dean Devlin? For shame, Roland Emmerich. For shame. (IMDb)

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5 Responses to DVD COMMENTARY: 10,000 BC (2008)

  1. Marissa says:

    Yes! New commentary. Now I gotta go out and rent the movie. Thank you for being the funniest comedy group of all time.

  2. Colin says:

    Omar Sharif? Star of the greatest movie of all time, DR. ZHIVAGO, slumming it?

    Flashbacks of the almost-brilliant THE 13TH WARRIOR, there.

  3. Colin says:

    Todd’s gonna be on BONES?

    Nice one. If you’re in a position to smell Emily Deschanel let us know what she smells like.

    I bet she smells intoxicating.

  4. laxdude says:

    Also suggest to Emily that it is a crime that her sister has not yet had a role on the show yet.

  5. Zarban! says:

    Wish me love a wishing well— Kiss and tell— A wishing well of mastodon tears!

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