Rewriting DVD Marketing Blurbs #7: Terminal Velocity

What the back of the DVD case says:

Dynamic Charlie Sheen (The Three Musketeers, Young Guns, TV’s Spin City) delivers fast-paced excitement to this high-flying action-adventure! Sheen stas as Ditch Brodie, a daredevil skydiving instructor who falls hard when a sexy, mysterious beauty (Nastassja Kinski) walks through his door looking for a lesson–and apparently plunges to her death during a parachute jump! Suddenly, Sheen finds himself hurled headlong into a nightmare world of intrigue and deceit–caught in a deadly game of cat and mouse with the Russian mafia! With pulse-pounding suspense and sensational skydiving, high-speed adventrue doesn’t move any faster than Terminal Velocity!

What it should say:

Charlie Sheen is crazy!

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4 Responses to Rewriting DVD Marketing Blurbs #7: Terminal Velocity

  1. Dom says:

    Charlie is awesome, granted that he does do some fucked up things. But you’ve still gotta love the guy.

  2. Marissa says:

    I second what Dom said. You can’t help but admire him, both in spite of and because of the things he does.

  3. God says:

    Or:

    “Even better than DROP ZONE!”

  4. Zarban! says:

    - fast-paced excitement
    - high-flying action-adventure
    - hurled headlong
    - nightmare world of intrigue
    - deadly game of cat and mouse
    - pulse-pounding suspense
    - high-speed adventure

    Dude wasn’t even trying. It’s like that Alice Cooper song “Under My Wheels”. I think he was just trying to jam as many cliches as possible in there on a bet.

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