Posts Tagged ‘CGI’

TRON Sequel Gets Points For Not Being A Reboot

March 9th, 2010 by Skelton

Plus, it has the original Tron: Bruce FUCKING Boxleitner! AND cranky old Jeff Bridges vs. possibly-evil YOUNG Jeff Bridges Computer Program. And No. 13 from “House M.D.” dressed like a neon porn star from a Stanley Kubrick wet dream. (more…)

DVD COMMENTARY: G.I. Joe – The Rise Of Cobra (2009)

February 9th, 2010 by Film Pigs

A new decade brings forth new life challenges. For the Film Pigs, this means sitting through the stupidest movie from the previous decade. It’s hard to quantify just how monumentally stupid G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra is, but with a running time of two hours, there’s plenty of time to try.

Based on the 1980s toy line (much like the other wildly expensive and brain damaging Transformers franchise), G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra tells the story of a bunch of assholes with a shitload of corporate money who want to take over the world for no discernible reason and the bunch of assholes with a shitload of government money who want to stop them. There are also nanobots.

The worst part of G.I. Joe is how forgettable it is, even during the viewing. Fun drinking game: every time Falk asks any variation of “Wait…is that Sienna Miller?”, take a drink.

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MOVIE REVIEW: Avatar (2009)

January 4th, 2010 by Film Pigs

The Pigs walk in with medium hopes and emerge as grumpy Smurfs. This one will piss people off. We’re sorryish. (IMDb)

STILL Better Than Terminator Salvation

November 30th, 2009 by Skelton

Before the blogosphere explodes in the age-old argument of which movie is worse, Terminator 3 or Terminator Salvation, let me state for the record that I think both movies are bad. However, Terminator 3 is watchable-bad (with some highly destructive stunts using real honest-to-God vehicles and a pretty well done bleak ending) while Terminator Salvation is an unwatchable mess full of nonsense CGI and a script with two A stories fighting each other for the chance to bore you to death.

That being said, I think Mostow made the right call in deleting the above scene from the final cut. It made me laugh while at the same time caused a sharp, stabbing pain in my brain.

MOVIE REVIEW: 2012 (2009)

November 19th, 2009 by Film Pigs

The Pigs see John Cusack destroy the hearts of 20-30something girls everywhere who still see him as Lloyd Dobler as he saves his family from the end of the world by driving a limo very fast and stealing beer from Woody Harrelson. This is one of the singularly stupidest films of all time, but kind of a blast. (IMDb)

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