Category Archives: All Posts

This is it. All the posts to the Film Pigs site in one giant, cumbersome list.

Movie Commentaries

Commentary #32 – The Core (2003)

Audio 14 Comments
poster_thecore

There’s nothing more refreshing than a big Hollywood movie with a plot based on sound science. Since those don’t exist, the Film Pigs watched The Core instead. We’re not sure what was more astounding: the Space Shuttle crash landing in the LA river (which could TOTALLY happen), the amount of people per square mile that have pacemakers, or Stanley Tucci’s wig.

None of the clearly well-researched science in this movie would be believable if Aaron Eckhart hadn’t been sporting the frosted surfer-boy locks that were so common among scientists of the early 2000s. And who knew The Next Karate Kid could pilot a train with a laser on front straight into the earth?

TO SYNC WITH MOVIE: Start this commentary 10 seconds after starting movie.

Blog

House M.D. To Record Blues Album

3 Comments

Actor Hugh Laurie has signed a deal to record a blues album. The 51-year-old, self-taught musician will team up with a range of guest stars for the New Orleans blues album, which he will record this summer. (via BBC)

Please, please, please! Duet album with Steven Seagal.

Blog

Film Pigs Double Feature Recommendation #1

1 Comment

If you happen to be suffering from a terrible summer cold and your family has (thankfully) left you alone for the afternoon, down a couple shots of Dayquil and throw these titles on your Netflix instant queue:

Capitalism: A Love Story and Manufacturing Dissent. Continue reading Film Pigs Double Feature Recommendation #1 →

Blog

Seagal Sexual Harassment Case Dismissed – Too Many Puns!

Leave a comment

A sexual harassment case made against actor Steven Seagal, whose credits include Under Siege and Flight of Fury, have been dropped. (via BBC)

One could say that Steven is Above The Law now that he is no longer Under Siege from his former assistant who was Out For Justice after accusing him of unwelcome advances toward her Fire Down Below.  Clearly, this was an Executive Decision to save everyone the Exit Wounds of a public trial. We have truly avoided a Black Dawn. Hopefully, no one involved will feel the need to seek Urban Justice. I’d hate to see anyone Pistol Whipped On Deadly Ground until they were Half Past Dead.

Movie Reviews

Review – Despicable Me (2010)

Video 2 Comments
Movie Commentaries

Commentary #31 – Hellbound (1994)

Audio 3 Comments
poster_hellbound

Have you ever wanted to listen to a commentary for a movie where Chuck Norris plays an on-the-edge Chicago cop who wanders around Israel looking for a demon who looks a lot like, but isn’t, Michael Ironside so he can stab him with a magical staff topped with a baked potato after defeating him with karate? If the answer is yes, you’re in for a treat!

In Hellbound, Chuck Norris is electrifying as Sgt. Shatter, a tough-as-nails pimp-slapping Chicago detective who gets caught up in an ancient battle between good and evil. Because a demon throws a prostitute out a window and onto the hood of his car. Because demons have a terrible problem keeping a low profile while waiting for their plans of hell on earth to come together. Which is why you can vanquish them with karate. In Israel. This movie makes no sense.

TO SYNC WITH MOVIE: Start this commentary 10 seconds after starting movie.