My friend told me she fell asleep during Hellboy II which led me to believe I’d hate it, too, but I went anyway because that’s just how much I like Ron Perlman. I was pleasantly surprised to find I was actually entertained by the CGI heavy picture show. I wondered why it was my friend fell asleep. Then I remembered that she had gotten a kick out of Iron Man and that one put me to sleep. Both movies lean on cartoons and loud noises to deliver their thrills. And even though I was amused by Hellboy II I can’t say I was so swept up by the action that I forgot where I was. I was very aware that I was a watching a big, silly summer movie the entire time I was watching it. So, why didn’t it put me to sleep? Well, I think it just boils down to a taste thing. While most of America seems to get off on watching a rich dude building a metal suit, I prefer watching monsters beating up other monsters. In the end, it’s all the cinematic equivelant of a cheap beer buzz. Sometimes you’re in the mood for cheap beer and you have a laugh, other times it just makes you tired as hell.
And I should note here that despite having a good time with old Red and his gang of freaks, the movie was not entirely satisfying. At about the halfway point I started wishing someone would just make a real action movie. Not a comic book action movie where Angelina Jolie impossibly picks up a dorky guy in her car while driving over a hundred miles an hour, but an action movie. Just car chases and fist fights and gunplay. No super-spy bullshit, either. And kill the damn shaky camera so I can actually see the car chases, fist fights, and gunplay. You know what I mean? Like an old Dirty Harry movie or Lethal Weapon or even like some old “B” movie with Norris or Stallone or Bronson. I got a taste of that with the new Rambo movie, but I’d like to get even more classic than that, you know, just a cop movie. Not some superhuman killing machine, or a guy in a metal suit, or a nice son of the devil or whatever. Just a cop. Who has to kick ass.
You know what I mean?
Lusty, lusty love, Todd.
P.S. I started my own more personal blog deal if you’re interested. http://toddrobertanderson.wordpress.com/