Featured Film Pigs Listicle: Most Tiresome, Corporate Marketing Term For A Sequel To A Long-Running/Long-Dead Franchise
If you love giant blue wang, you’ll love Watchmen (IMDb). If you’re a comic book supergeek, you’ll bitch and complain about how they left some stuff out and they changed the ending and they’ve now killed your childhood. Otherwise: meh.
Featured Film Pigs Listicle: Favorite Moment From A Superhero Movie
The Pigs go out to see the movie everyone has already gone out to see! Their butts all hurt by the end of the show! The movie’s too long! Believe it! Comic books! Waa-hoo! (IMDb)
My friend told me she fell asleep during Hellboy II which led me to believe I’d hate it, too, but I went anyway because that’s just how much I like Ron Perlman. I was pleasantly surprised to find I was actually entertained by the CGI heavy picture show. I wondered why it was my friend fell asleep. Then I remembered that she had gotten a kick out of Iron Man and that one put me to sleep. Both movies lean on cartoons and loud noises to deliver their thrills. And even though I was amused by Hellboy II I can’t say I was so swept up by the action that I forgot where I was. I was very aware that I was a watching a big, silly summer movie the entire time I was watching it. So, why didn’t it put me to sleep? Well, I think it just boils down to a taste thing. While most of America seems to get off on watching a rich dude building a metal suit, I prefer watching monsters beating up other monsters. In the end, it’s all the cinematic equivelant of a cheap beer buzz. Sometimes you’re in the mood for cheap beer and you have a laugh, other times it just makes you tired as hell. Continue reading Pick Your Computer Generated Poison
The decimated ranks of the Pigs — after the evil indie movie world stole Todd for a month of shooting — go and see the completely unnecessary Hulk reboot. Mop-toppy, CGI-y, Liv Tylery. Plus three male supporting actors fighting for who can chew the scenery fastest, like a thespian game of Hungry Hungry Hippos. (IMDb)
$130 million and still at #1, the Film Pigs skip with schoolgirl-like delight to what promises to be an ultra-stylistic bloodfest: “300”. Even Falk rushes back to the States from his whirlwind European vacation to experience the sweet, sweet techno-slaughter. Two hours later, only sadness and confusion remain…Spartans! Prepare for BOREDOM! (IMDb)