If you love giant blue wang, you’ll love Watchmen (IMDb). If you’re a comic book supergeek, you’ll bitch and complain about how they left some stuff out and they changed the ending and they’ve now killed your childhood. Otherwise: meh.
Featured Film Pigs Listicle: Favorite Moment From A Superhero Movie
My friend told me she fell asleep during Hellboy II which led me to believe I’d hate it, too, but I went anyway because that’s just how much I like Ron Perlman. I was pleasantly surprised to find I was actually entertained by the CGI heavy picture show. I wondered why it was my friend fell asleep. Then I remembered that she had gotten a kick out of Iron Man and that one put me to sleep. Both movies lean on cartoons and loud noises to deliver their thrills. And even though I was amused by Hellboy II I can’t say I was so swept up by the action that I forgot where I was. I was very aware that I was a watching a big, silly summer movie the entire time I was watching it. So, why didn’t it put me to sleep? Well, I think it just boils down to a taste thing. While most of America seems to get off on watching a rich dude building a metal suit, I prefer watching monsters beating up other monsters. In the end, it’s all the cinematic equivelant of a cheap beer buzz. Sometimes you’re in the mood for cheap beer and you have a laugh, other times it just makes you tired as hell. Continue reading Pick Your Computer Generated Poison→
The decimated ranks of the Pigs — after the evil indie movie world stole Todd for a month of shooting — go and see the completely unnecessary Hulk reboot. Mop-toppy, CGI-y, Liv Tylery. Plus three male supporting actors fighting for who can chew the scenery fastest, like a thespian game of Hungry Hungry Hippos. (IMDb)
$130 million and still at #1, the Film Pigs skip with schoolgirl-like delight to what promises to be an ultra-stylistic bloodfest: “300”. Even Falk rushes back to the States from his whirlwind European vacation to experience the sweet, sweet techno-slaughter. Two hours later, only sadness and confusion remain…Spartans! Prepare for BOREDOM! (IMDb)
The Film Pigs attend the worst double-feature in history. What should have be a delightful evening full of action (IMDb) and comedy (IMDb) only serves to destroy the spirit and strain the liver. $63 wasted on tickets, probably upwards of $100 spent wisely on scotch. The horror, the horror.